


Swiggity Swad this is so Bad

by WhiteRabbit333



Category: swag - Fandom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-26
Updated: 2013-06-26
Packaged: 2017-12-16 05:45:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/858518
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhiteRabbit333/pseuds/WhiteRabbit333
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>gather round young swagglings, for the elder swag is about to spit some mad beats like dre</p>
            </blockquote>





	Swiggity Swad this is so Bad

'Swiggity swather all young ones gather, im’bout to spit beats like that old homeless rapper….wait, what’s his name again? Lil Wayne was it?’ said the wise elder swag. All the young swaglets gathered around the fire place, some wrapped in obey blankets, others wearing van ugg boots, and some more little swaglets were resting in a giant snapback. Elder swag then begun the story that all the little swaglets loved to hear, the story of how the boy discovered his swag. 

Once upon a time, there was a boy, around 16 years old, who was tired with his life. He saw other people around him having fun with each other, and wanted to have fun too, but alas, he couldn’t, for he was not cool enough, so he left. He travelled the world, near, far, where ever you are *chokes on Celine Dion* for something that would make him cool, but at every place he stopped, he never found it. He searched for years, for things like Jan sports bags, jeggings, bebo, and nerd glasses, only to find them too late, their coolness all gone. Then one day, he came across an old thrift shop with an old man sitting outside repeating the word what what what what over and over again. The boy wondered what the old man was what-ing about, so he asked the old man, and the old man replied “if u really want swag, you’re gonna have to find an old man and rob him, but no, don’t rob me, for I am wise and dreary, this convo is over” then the old man promptly fell asleep. The boy walked away from the old man and into the thrift shop confused as to why the old man sung the words to him. He began his search for coolness again, only to remember that strange word the old man had said. Swag. Swag? What did it mean? Was it something old men carried around with them, like their glasses, or a newspaper? The boy was so confused, and considered giving up his search for coolness, when he looked up and saw something. He reached out to grab it, and pulled out an old hat, that must’ve only been cool when LL Cool J was around. He dusted it off, and it said Chicago bulls. The boy had no idea what this was for, as he knew there were no bulls in Chicago, but the longer he looked at the hat, the more he wanted to cut his hair, chop the bottom of his pants off, and wear button up shirts casually. Swag. This must be it. This is what the boy needed, not coolness, he needed swag. Ecstatic about his discovery, the boy ran out of the shop, wearing the ‘snap back’, as he called the hat, because of the convenient snapper on the back, his newly acquired tan shorts and varsity jacket, and his new vans. He screamed “YOLO” while swaggering down the street, because running was too unswag for him now, and people looked at him wild-eyed, as they had never seen anyone with so much coolness before. He passed people, overhearing them saying how cool he looked, and he replied “honey, I aint cool, I have swag, that’s all I need” and then walked in to the sunset, while taking selfies and posting them on instagram. 

The swaglets cheered for joy when the story was over, all happy with their history lesson in swag 101. Elder swag happily said “im glad that you little swaglets liked the story of our forefather, Justin B. Ieber, next up, I’ll tell you the story of our leading lady, Miley C. Yrus, in the story of how the girl became unique: a hipster tale” and so, Elder swag continued, telling the most famous stories of all time, showing the swaglets just how important having swag is, and how the world now is built up around swag.


End file.
